Rree advice on the types of men to avoid

SOME FREE ADVICE
The Types Of
Men To Avoid
By Neli Lalanne

No you liar, you do not want to be my friend. Honestly you mean to tell me that you woke up this morning and realized that your social life was decaying and as you are pumping gas in your vehicle, spotted me and thought, “well hey, based on her hairstyle she seems to have good friend potential, perhaps we should develop a strictly platonic bond, share our heartaches, hopes and dreams and be there for each other in the future.

Is that what some guys really believe? If so I truly apologize for having been so cavalier and skeptical about your motives, to think that all along I have been avoiding you, pretending I didn’t speak English, inventing an imaginary fiancé, and even once suggested I was a lesbian – which I must admit was a failed attempt at ending the undesired conversation.

What can I say; experiences and unfortunate mishaps have steadily increased my faith in the deceiving nature of men, bringing my trust level down to negative 7. Girls correct me if I am wrong but there are 6 types of men to steer clear of:

The self proclaimed thug, you’ve met him, he wears platinum teeth, has his name tattooed on his arm (just in case he forgets it), and each of his scars tell the story of a fight during which he flirted w/ death. He generally carries around wads of money, yet you have no clue what he does for a living. He is the kind who will probably take his rims over you, trust me, and leave the soldiers for destiny’s child.

The player, you have lusted for him. He is smooth and knows just what to say, he has an impeccable dress style and a winning smile, his cell phone also rings, vibrates, or beeps every 7 minutes forcing him to leave the room to answer mysterious phone calls. He is still friends with all his exes and although you may think that that’s very open minded and avant garde, leave him alone or else you’ll find yourself in a threesome wondering just how you got there.

The intellectual asshole, he has come your way. He is smart and well spoken, knows about history and never misses an occasion to flaunt his list of degrees. Patronizing as hell, he links all of your problems to slavery and his favorite subject to discuss is ‘mental oppression’. Believe me there is only room for one Dr. Phil in anyone’s life.

The workaholic, you may or may not have dealt with him. The overzealous entrepreneur, he works long hours and will never notice your pretty white, red, or yellow dress because the only color he admires is green. Take my word for it, find the nearest exit door and step out, or else you are bound to eat all your romantic candle light dinner for two alone…while wondering what project he and his equally dedicated female assistant are working on now.

The church addict, his faith is strong but he is consistently trying to save your soul. He brings his bible along on first dates. You can’t use replacement curse words around him as he frowns when you say “what the hec”. Be sure not to enter his circle for you truly do not want to be in the frontline when he starts the next holly war against mini skirts.

The psychopath, he roams the streets blending in with the rest of human kind. He is a bit jealous and you think that is cute, but in his world, going out on two dates means that you are soul-mates and if it wasn’t on your agenda to marry him, he’ll uncover his crazy side and you will soon be filing for a restraining order.

Now girls on some level you have come across and dealt with those colorful individuals. They’ve amused you, loved you, scared you, stalked you, used you and more often than not deceived you. Take it from me, stay away from the ‘thuggish players with psychopath tendencies” and avoid the workaholic intellectuals with fanatic inclinations; in the end it will do you a world of good.