Is a sexless guy-girl friendship possible?

DOES THE
POSSIBILITY EXIST?
The Sexless
Guy/Girl Friendship

By Elizabeth Philippe

I have recently been placed in a situation which caused me to excavate the long-buried issue and beg the question: Can men and women perfectly coexist in a platonic friendship? Once a firm believer of this phenomenon (as I have been fully capable of forming and maintaining non-sexual dealings with my male counterparts) some rather recent occurrences are slowly shifting my perception of the ordeal in the opposite direction.

The men in my life are divided and labeled within three separate categories. At the present time, there are one or two men with whom I am very close who at some point I did have feelings for. For one reason or the other, our friendship remained untainted by sexual prowess and we have never crossed any boundaries. There is an additional one or two whose throats my tongue has been down but again, for whatever reason, we remained platonic. Finally, there are the guys whom I have never had one inkling of a feeling for; the men who, even if they stood naked in front of me glistening in Johnson and Johnson’s baby oil with the body and powerfully sexy voice of the King Leonidus himself, I would not find myself tossing my panties aside in hopes of hours of immense pleasure like I envisioned with the Spartan while in the theater watching 300…twice! For quite some time now, each of the men in each of these categories has simply been a friend—without benefits; no thoughts of engaging in relations whatsoever. These are the guys I call up and invite over for popcorn in PJ’s on Blockbuster nights, whose ears I flood with pointless-yet-exciting life tales like those in an episode of Seinfeld; who I can dance sexily with at clubs and parties without the fear of being groped or harassed.

So why am I getting the feeling that somewhere in the back of some of their minds, what we have is not platonic at all? Is it possible that a guy, like a girl, plays the "friend" role in anticipation of a breakup with her partner only to swoop in for consolation, hoping that the she would see that what she is looking for lies within him? I try my best to be oblivious to the fact that some men actually do reveal characteristics usually exhibited by women as it makes the man seem as though he hung his balls up to dry but the fact is…some men do.

Maybe I am just being naļve in thinking that the magnetic forces that attract penis to vagina can be controlled by the invisible barrier that is a platonic relationship. Think about it. Where does the term “friends with benefits” apply? Somewhere out there is a man and woman who are actually so bestial, so incapable of finding a partner who they actually share feelings for to engage in multiple shag sessions with that they must rely on someone deemed a “friend.” In my experience, this so-called friend was a man whose last name I repeatedly began saying with my first name to see how well it would suit me after we got married. He may have seen me as a friend but I saw him as my love slave. Platonic sex? I think not!

Even though a “friend” of mine recently decided that my tongue needed a massage and the instrument he would use was his own, I will try my best to remain an avid believer of the sexless guy-girl association. I do realize that not every instance is the same and not all men have a master plan to pretend to want a casual relationship but essentially casually want “in.” Some may in fact want to have an open and honest relationship with one of their female friends, but let's be real...the majority of the time, sex is the underlying catalyst. What do folks do when they are on a dry sex spell? They turn to friends to alleviate their yearnings.

Although way too many men let their penises live their lives for them, there are a few who have mastered the art of control and realize that the penis does not control them, they control the penis. They are one with the penis. These men can actually keep their members in their pants in exchange for a lifetime of a great friendship.

I cherish those men.