WONDERLUST
The Seven New
Wonders Of The World
By Zain Deane

On July 7, the much-ballyhooed list of seven new wonders of the world was released by the New7Wonders Foundation in Lisbon, Portugal (home to an impartial zero wonders of the world). In keeping with the current fashion, the winners were selected purely by “the people” through a first-ever global election. For those who missed the results or couldn’t care less, here are your chosen winners:

The Great Wall of China
Petra, Jordan
Christ the Redeemer, Brazil
The Taj Mahal, India
Chichén Itzá, Mexico
Macchu Picchu, Peru
The Colosseum, Italy

Lost in all the cheering and high-fiving by proud winning nations were a few hysterical side-stories and some notable wonder-snubs. Did you know, for example, that the Pyramids of Giza, one of the original wonders of the world, was named, “after careful consideration,” an honorary New7Wonders Candidate? How the hell does a monument get honorary wonder status? Well, here’s how: apparently, as reported in Wikipedia, the Egyptians were so pissed off that these new wonders were stealing the old wonders’ thunder that they raised a hue and cry about the whole thing. After all, the pyramids are the only surviving old wonder, and as a result have been afforded a well-deserved reverence. The honorary designation was meant, I suppose, to mollify them, but it’s also left me confused. When I visit the pyramids (as I intend to do at least once in my lifetime), should I gaze in rapt new wonder or old wonder?

The Egyptians were not the only ones who were irked by this global wonder-identification movement. Even the UN threw in its two cents: UNESCO released a statement in June 2007 that categorically denied any link between its World Heritage Programme and this campaign. This statement, taken almost verbatim from UNESCO’s web site, helps to highlight the feeling of global amity and cooperation that New7Wonders has engendered:

There is no comparison between [the] … mediatised campaign and the scientific and educational work resulting from the inscription of sites on UNESCO’s World Heritage List. The list of the “7 New Wonders of the World” will be the result of a private undertaking, reflecting only the opinions of those with access to the internet and not the entire world. This initiative cannot, in any significant and sustainable manner, contribute to the preservation of sites elected by this public.

Now that’s friendly competition. Of course, an online contest can hardly be held to the same standards as the UN’s exhaustive compilation. This was a popularity contest, which meant that the roughly 14,000 citizens of Mali had no chance of seeing their candidate, Timbuktu, reach the podium for a victory speech. However, I was surprised to see that a few quite famous landmarks missed getting into the treasured Top Seven. Among the snubs (and my supremely unscientific theories on why they didn’t make it) are:

The Eiffel Tower, France – Despite being one of the most iconic of all the candidates, the tall and graceful monument to French pride fell short. Sorry, Gustave, but I have a feeling the French in general couldn’t give a damn about the contest

The Acropolis, Greece – While I can’t fault the winners, I find this one hard to believe: the Acropolis, and the Parthenon in particular, clearly fits the mold of an ancient wonder…doesn’t it? Apparently not. Maybe the fact that its temples lie in various stages of crumbling ruin hurt its chances. It would be like voting for a Miss Universe candidate who was missing a few front teeth.

Angkor, Cambodia – I think this one was largely the result of near total anonymity. Many Americans have never heard of Angkor, much less Cambodia. I won’t even bring up the Khmer Empire. But still, aren’t there about a billion Hindus running around the world today? You’d think they’d log on and cast their vote for Angkor Wat, which symbolizes the Hindu cosmos. Doesn’t everybody in India have internet access? Who else answers the phone when I call tech support? Anyway … let’s move on.

The Statue of Liberty – I’m surprised at this not because it didn’t win, but rather because it was the only American showing at the contest. As much as I love the sight of Lady Liberty, there were better options for voters. But I think we needed a few more ringers in the game. Where was Donald Trump’s hair? Where was the Las Vegas strip? Where were the millions of voters who put Bush in office for a second term? These, my friends, are the real American wonders.

Ah well, the votes have been cast, and assuming there was no vote-tampering (Less than seven million Jordanians voting more than 14 million times? Hmm.), the finalists have been chosen. We must honor them and bask in their more-wondrous-than-the-others glow.

Stay tuned, however. I’ll be closely following the new campaign under way by New7Wonders to elect the New Seven Wonders of Nature. Let’s hope the original wonders of nature don’t take offense.