DATING DOT COM In a column toward the end of her remarkable career, the late advice diva Ann Landers proclaimed that online dating was officially a perfectly acceptable vehicle for singles to find love. Or to at least find a date. For a long time, couples who met online dreaded the unavoidable question asked by friends and family upon meeting their significant others: "So, where did you two meet?" The question was inevitably followed by an uncomfortable silence, a change of subject or even an occasional boldface lie: The grocery store, a bar or, simply, "around." The days of hiding one's affinity for dating via DSL, however, are - and Ms. Landers concurred - officially over. Not only is online dating perfectly acceptable, Internet minglers now know exactly what - and whom - they want. Thus, the demand for more specific sites - sites catering to a myriad of cultures, ethnicities, religions and so on - has grown exponentially in the past five years. Peggy Pendergast, marketing manager for FriendFinder.com , which hosts approximately 10 sites that are ethnically or culturally specific, including ItalianFriendFinder.com, Amigos.com, JewishFriendFinder.com and IndianFriendFinder.com, says the reason their company has continued to add so many culture-driven sites to their network is a simple case of supply and demand. "These sites exist," Pendergast says, "because of the growing need for sites geared toward specific nationalities. Singles today know exactly what they're looking for. Sites like Match.com or Yahoo.com are very broad; if you're looking for someone who is Jewish, or someone who is Indian, a site geared toward that particular group of people makes it much easier." One need only look at the numbers to affirm Pendergast's theory: Memberships to AsiaFriendFinder.com alone stand at over five million worldwide. The international aspect of sites dedicated to individual cultures is also a draw for potential members. While most of us won't travel outside a 30-mile radius to meet Mr./Ms. Right, members of sites catering to Arabs, Asians, Italians, etc., are willing to travel longer distances - as in continents - to meet one another. "Oh yeah, people absolutely move," says WorldSingles.com 's Idan Ravin. "A lot of people have found their soulmates in other countries and are willing to move wherever to be with them." The ability to simply talk to and meet people with similar backgrounds halfway around the world is also a draw. Arabs in Miami are as interested in meeting other local Arabs as they are those in Europe. It's all about connecting to people who know where you're coming from, who you can talk to about cultural issues that friends who don't share your background may not be able to relate to, Ravin says. "The Iranian community, for example," he says, "they live all over the place. To be able to connect all these people, that's what a lot of people who join our sites are looking for." Although a site geared toward a specific culture or religion may, some might argue, narrow one's options, the desire to meet someone with common interests, lifestyles and values is undeniably universal. And although online dating in more traditional cultures may have initially been seen as taboo, or frowned upon, it has since become a legitimate, popular alternative to meeting a potential mate through more "old fashioned" channels. "They're tired of relying on their families, churches to meet people," Ravin says of singles in traditional cultures. "Greeks, Arabs, people of many ethnicities rely on families and arranged marriages. Today, though, they're more independent than their parents and their parents' parents; they want to go outside of traditional bounds." Started by Said Amin, who is Iranian, and Michel Soudee, who is French, WorldSingles.com's business has grown almost 400 percent each year since its launch in 2001. Ravin estimates that they now have over half a million members on their ethnocentric sites, which include ArabLounge.com, EligibleGreeks.com, AmigosyMas.com, SoulSingles.com and about six others. Numbers aside, however, it's the e-mails Ravin, Pendergast and others invested in online dating networks receive on a daily basis from members who have found friendship, love and even marriage through their sites that truly signify success. And no advertisement can compete in effectiveness with a true, personal account either from within each site's "testimonials" section or simply from word of mouth. "When you hop on a site," Ravin says, "and you see people you know on it, that starts to have a ripple effect." Twenty-eight-year-old Sue Saim, who lives in Southern California, says she came across IranianPersonals.com while surfing the Internet and was amazed by its number of international members. She says after dating someone who wasn't Iranian, she decided she wanted to try forming relationships with those with whom she shared a cultural connection. Her parents were skeptical at first, but after she began meeting so many Iranians from around the world - some with whom she formed friendships she keeps to this day and one whom she seriously dated - they soon realized the cultural value in the site. "[These sites] bring people together who would normally be isolated by geographical distance. They may be halfway around the world, but you still are able to get a real feel for their character," Saim says of her experience with IranianPersonals.com. "It has been such a positive experience for me - I've made some really strong, lasting friendships, and it's important sometimes, whether it's a friendship or more - to have that base of commonality." Ann Landers surely would have agreed with that. |
|
|
 |
|
|
|
© 2004-2008 The Clermont Group, Inc. All Rights Reserved.